iNdecision

So the dudes at CERN have finally done it and now the particles are crashing into each other like demented but absolutely teensy dodgem cars. And we’re all still here.

So far.

Prof Brian Cox, previously mentioned here, has been tweeting up a storm, excitedly comparing the LHC to a cup of milky coffee (apparently there is more energy in the latter, making it much more of a threat to the planet than the former - I think he’s been reading me). He also threatened to chin the next person to say ‘black hole’ to him. How refreshing to see a public figure take a stand on the issues that really matter.

No sign yet, unfortunately, of the elusive Higgs Boson. It’s bound to be in the last place they look.

But even if we had been sucked into a black hole, it would have been as nothing when compared to the fathomless vortex of desire into which I am being inexorably dragged.
Bit by bit, day by day, they’re coming to get me. Clad in spotless (they obviously don’t have cats) black polo necks, and chanting strange mantras like ‘pinch to zoom’ and ‘let’s go for sushi!’, they resemble little more than the sinister beings who took over the world in The Invasion of the Bodysnatchers.

Ok, so the fashion is a bit different, but you get the idea. Soon, if you’re found not in possession of an iPhone, you will be exposed as ’the uncool’ by expressionless zombies pointing at you and shrieking like my coffee machine whipping up a manchiato.

I speak as someone who has owned two iPhones, both purchased on the first day of availability. My body was snatched a long time ago.

And now there’s the iPad.

We’ve known about it for a couple of months now, and reactions have varied from ‘it’s a big iPhone. What’s the fuss?’ to ‘it’s a big iPhone that is going to change the world and I am so excited I think my head’s about to fall off’.

I have one foot in each camp, which is odd, because I could never do the splits.

On the one hand, I already have an iPhone and I already have a computer. The iPad is neither one thing nor the other and won’t replace either of them. I don’t need one.

On the other hand...drool. And slobber. And drool again. I want one.

On the third hand, there is the possibility that it will actually change the world. And if there’s any world-changing gonna be happening that involves fiddling around with gadgets instead of armed uprising or particle beams, I want to be part of it.

So it’s a dilemma. What do you think? Should I get one? My decision will be based very nearly entirely on what you say.

No pressure.

Comments

[SarahSiddons]

speaking as a fellow gadget-o-phile I understand your pain ... the tradeoff between keeping what you already have and going for that lovely, shiny, new, must-have-it-thedaybeforeyesterday thing.

World changing - don't know about that, but *glances furtively about* they're after me as well *hides*

[njhamer]

Buying an iPad is the technology equivalent of buying a valve trombone. Quirky, but unnecessary and frankly excessive.

[The Butler]

Being a bit of an Apple geek myself... I can see absolutley no value in the ipad that I don't already have in my house full of istuff....it doesn't fill any holes that my iMac,
MacBook pro, and iphone can't fill. So in true Apple fashion.... I already have my iPad on pre-order!!!!

[Lev Parikian]

Thanks all for your comments. I think it might be world-changing (certainly more than the valve trombone). The world of publishing has some serious decisions to make. I can see that people who are likely to buy this are going to load it up with a few eBooks (whether they read them or not is another matter). These people would never have bought a Kindle, and the reading experience on the iPhone isn't that special. Adequate and convenient, but not special. The reading experience on the iPad looks as if it will be very enjoyable, and there will be an interactivity that will make it that much more attractive to non-or-not-very-often-readers. Children will love it too, and it opens up all sorts of possibilities for interactive video-picture-game-books. For education purposes there are serious possibilities too, already hinted at in a demo by Penguin here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdExukJVUGI. And I wonder if it mightn't be about right for music (in time): imagine a device that delivers ultra-legible music, and turns the pages for you because it recognises the music that is being played. Assuming, that is, that you're playing it right...There is already an app for it...
David - I'm with you!

[trickygirl]

I bet they find the Higgs Boson down the back of the sofa in the staff room at CERN, along with 57 euros in loose change, half a Mars Bar, several small solar systems and a variety of assorted nuts and bolts. Y'know, the usual stuff...

[Mark]

Do they make pockets bigger?

[The Sis In Law]

The ipocket! Surely the PTB are at work on one of those already? It looks like a big iphone to me and I don't even have one of them! Most important qu with any new Apple tech.... how long does the battery last and how hot does it get in the process?

[Edward Solomon]

I love the valve trombone analogy. However, my preference is an adapted quote from Blackadder: "Making an iPad is like fitting wheels to a tomato, time-consuming and completely unnecessary."

[Dan Holloway]

You know we're dedicating an anthology to the Higgs Boson over at Year Zero? I'm sure Marcella would love you to contribute

http://yearzerowriters.wordpress.com/2010/04/01/an-open-call-for-higgs-boson-stories/